See What I Did Here?

I have one more poem for the last day of February! :)

See if you can find the hidden message in this one!

There are no rhymy words in this poem. It's more like a riddle I think...

He gave me something to die For                         

                                             God gave me her. 

And I loved her So!      

                                                       Loved her from day one.

She shows me The 

                                                          World in totally new way.

What a blessing He     

                                        Gave me in her!

I know that she is His      

                                                                                      Only He could make something so special.

She's not the same kind of gift as his Son                                 

                                                           That was a gift for my soul.

Same goes for Whoever 

                                                                        Believes. But Autumn was just for me! 

She restores my faith In              

                                                         Him daily, and in humanity.

Fight for me, she Will!         

                                                          Not usually with me though.

Our bond won't Parish.      

                                                             But because He's blessed it so.

I'm so grateful for all I Have               

                                                 Eternal-ly blessed with

My crazy, beautiful Life     

Did you see what I did there? 

No? 

Wanna read it again? 

It isn't as clean as it is on paper, but the center words all the way down are a paraphrase of John 3:16.

I literally wrote those out before I filled in anything about my sister. I had no idea what I was going to do with it when I wrote those words. I had to play with it just a little to get it to fit, and not be too obvious. Share if you got it right away. If not, share and see if your friends get it! :) 

Listening

One thing I have definitely improved upon this past year is listening when God is telling me to do something. Whether or not I think it is a good idea for me. This probably came from a very short period of time where I wanted to do things my way, but it didn't work out for me.  It never will if I am following my desires.

Although I don't want to share that time of my life, I wanted to share with you all my realization. It is probably something you've heard before. He always gives you what is best for you, and He can see every other option. Don't be afraid to listen and follow His will for you. Like Moses, even if you are afraid to speak He will give you words.

Since about August I've been listening in a different way than before. I've always tried to listen, but sometimes I didn't consider what He might be telling me about things that are extremely personal. Because of that, I had to experience some things that could have easily been avoided. I started listening about everything, and putting Him above anything I might have considered personal. It really does happen that when you put God first, everything else falls into place! Some things that I thought were unable to mend, He fixed. But that came from me giving Him all of me and letting Him work in my life. Without the listening, the blessings do not happen. If we don't follow what He wants, how can we expect the best for us to happen?

I realize this is a very short post, but it is intended as more of a note than a story. Thank you for reading.

Embrace Your Weirdom

Because it is the beginning of October and the weirdness is beginning to come out (and in some cases, amplify) in most people, I want to take this opportunity to share my weirdness with you. Actually, I want to take it a step further and "embrace my weirdom," while at the same time challenging you to embrace your weirdom. I'm not gonna judge you, and those who truly love you will not judge you either.

I don't really know what normal is in terms of people. Everyone has their own definition of that word, but no one's definition is completely correct for everyone. I think that "normal" ought to be defined by each individual person, because otherwise it really cannot be applied to people. For example, what is normal for me might not be normal at all for any of my readers. Normality in my life consists of worshiping God, finger stabs, insulin injections, a love of reading, writing, and all other kinds of schoolwork, enjoyment in cleaning, anime, gaming, and many other things. I am not "normal," but that doesn't bother me. I like who I am, and I don't intend to be anything different. Let me explain my weirdom to you. I want to discuss the ways I am weird and attempt to explain to you why.

My Christian faith in the modern world would make me very weird. Especially the fact that I have completely given my life to Christ and I now let Him govern it. Even some of those who claim to be Christians do not live in such a way and they cannot understand why I do. It used to infuriate me, but I don't let it bother me anymore. I don't cuss, I don't drink, I don't party, I don't listen to music with an inappropriate message, I don't really date without a Godly purpose either. I don't do anything with my life that I don't feel like Jesus would approve of. I don't care who approves of it on this earth; if Jesus does not approve, then I refuse to do it. For example, I took an Ethics class in college semester (it was a required class). It was an online class in which we spent the entire 16 weeks arguing back and forth about who had "right" morals. We discussed things like premarital sex, abortion, murder, animal cruelty and other sensitive topics. The fun part was that the teacher was grading us based on her opinion of our personal morals. I actually got a failing grade on one of her questions because I refused to say that morals created God, when I knew that God has created everything. To me, that is normal. That is completely giving my life to Christ and allowing Him to use it for His will, not my own. I like being this kind of weird. It literally gives my life purpose to live for Christ. It inspires me to see people around me living in such a way as well. In fact, I appreciate those people more than they know. I could go on, but I believe this could be an entire post, or perhaps even an entire blog on its own.

One of the big parts about being a diabetic is the finger stabs and insulin injections. I hate it when people tell me things like "I could never live like that!" or "How do you do it?" I do it because without it I would die. I do it because I've done it my entire life. I do it because it is normal for me. (I assure you, if you had to prick your finger 12 times a day and get a shot of insulin every time you ate to survive, you would do it too.) For the past 18 years of my life (since I was 10 months old) I have stabbed my finger at least 5 times a day. Until I was five (when I got an insulin pump for the first time) I checked my sugar ever 2 hours (twelve times a day). I also had to eat and get a shot of insulin every 2 hours. This was not fun, but it was normal for me. I now have an insulin pump and a dexcom (checks my sugar every 5 minutes and tells me a pattern of highs and lows), but I still check at least 5 times a day the traditional way. The insulin pump gets me off of shots, so I just have tubing hanging from me 24/7. There is tubing running from my body to the pump so it gives me a consistent flow of insulin, like an IV. This may seem weird to you, but I am actually grateful to have it. This kind of weird keeps me alive. It has helped to make me into who I am. I have learned over the years to embrace the disease. Actually, November 14th is International Type 1 Diabetes day and for the past 3 years I have had blue hair on that day. Blue is our color, so making my hair blue shows support and raises awareness. That is the kind of weird that I like. Crazy with a purpose. That is the kind of weird I want to embrace.

Another thing I mentioned above was a love of reading, writing, and all other kinds of schoolwork. Yeah, I think I'm the definition of nerd. I enjoy learning, so I seek opportunities to learn. I was home-schooled all the way through high school, so the world was my classroom. I have learned new things everywhere and now I know how to look for things I didn't previously know. I used to create algebra problems to help me sleep at night (even I admit that was too weird now...). I write every day about everything. I can take random things and find a way to fit them into a story. For example, I wrote a zombie story about one of my former workplaces. I like learning not just book things, but I like learning about people too. More often than not I am the listener in a conversation, because I learn more with silence than I do with speech. The lessons I learn from others can be more valuable than any amount of book lessons on this planet. That type of thinking is normal for me. If that is weird, then so be it.

I also mentioned that I like to clean. I'm not kidding. I've always liked to clean. It soothes me. I clean especially when I am incredibly stressed out, because it gives me a sense of peace. I learned why not that long ago while talking to a friend. Before I told him why, I didn't really know why myself. But I learned that cleaning up my physical clutter somehow helps me clean up my emotional and spiritual clutter. That is why it is normal for me to clean, because I'm not only cleaning up what people can see. Its hard to explain, but a good way to put it is that it is like cleaning my soul. I get somewhat unhappy when my house is messy and it begins to make me feel like a failure for some reason. It can also go the opposite way, though. When I feel too upset, I won't clean. Then it gets messy and makes it worse. The "pain" doesn't go away until I've cleaned up the physical, spiritual and emotional clutter. I guess that cleaning is just an outlet for me, kind of like crying is for most people. That is normal for me, no matter how weird it sounds.

I am going to clump anime and gaming together for the purposes of this post. Before I continue, let me just say anime is not a cartoon. Both anime and games are a very neat form of art that often go unnoticed. Anime is many different forms of art, ranging from screenplay to the drawing of the characters. Everything that goes into just one episode is cared about deeply by the directors, so each one is a masterpiece that the directors are quite proud of. Games are most likely the same way, but I'm not positive of that. The graphics in some games are quite realistic, so one can imagine that the artist might have cared more for his project. (Side note: when I say games, I mean games like TERA or Slender, not bubbletown. I play those too, but for mindless amusement most of the time.) My favorite animes are Sword Art Online (and all of its other "seasons"), Blue Exorcist and Black Butler. I also like My Little Monster and Vampire Knight. I enjoy them for the storyline, because it inspires me as a writer. For example, SAO (Sword Art Online) had the most beautiful ending I have ever seen in any form of television series, movie, or other show. That gets my creativity working. That is part why I like anime so much. My absolute favorite game is TERA, but sometimes I play Five Nights At Freddy's when I decide I want to throw my computer across the room in terror (I am a very easy person to scare. I even jumped when an alien attacked me in Half-Life one time!). I love Zelda, but it is more of a workout for me than a relaxing experience. Especially when I die in the game. I play it on the Wii, and I refuse to play sitting down because I get very animated with the game. My little sister thinks it is hilarious. She also likes it when I play Five Nights At Freddy's for the reason I have mentioned. Autumn (my sister) is the one who got me into all of that to begin with. She is way more into anime than I am and she wanted to share that experience with me, so she got me into it a few years ago. That is why I like anime and games so much. We often use that for our "sister date," which is my absolute favorite day of the week! She is my best friend and I enjoy all the time I get to spend with her. I play games like TERA with her as a form of escape so I can get away from my crazy life for a little while. We watch anime for the same reason. It is more about the closeness with her than it is about the game or the show for me, although I enjoy that as well.

Some other fun facts about me that may or may not be weird is that I like to be outside. I love hiking, walking in nature, or basically anything I can do to "get lost." That doesn't usually go with the love of anime and/or games, but that's how I work. I also hate cooking, want 10 kids, only ever wear heels or converse (sometimes cowboy boots, but rarely anymore) and love to travel and drive my Jeep. I don't know how I'm going to feed my 10 kids without cooking, so I'll have to work on that.

Well, there are some fun facts about me. That is all the stuff that makes me "weird."

But what I wanted to say when I challenged you to "embrace your weirdom" was this: we are created as individuals, not one singular being. The things about you that might be considered weird are things that are included in your individuality. Embrace that! Tell the world about it! You are not "weird." You are unique. Individual. You. God created you for a reason and I'm certain the reason was not to follow the multitudes. Embrace who He created, because He definitely doesn't make mistakes!

So, please. Go forth and be weird. Embrace your individuality. And if you want to, leave me a comment telling me what makes you "weird" and why. I would love to hear from you!

What Matters More?

God has a funny way of bringing me back to Him. Every time I'm struggling to keep up with my life, He reminds me that putting Him first makes everything else fall into place. 

There is only so much time in a day. We are given 24 hours to do whatever we want. However, when we keep adding things to our plate, we quickly fill up those hours. At that point, we must decide what we like best and keep making time for those things.

Keyword here: making time. 

I play many different roles in my life. College student, Christian, sister, daughter, tutor, employee, friend etc. I want to do my best at preforming those roles. It takes time to do those things!

Let me put it this way. If I have twenty-four hours in one day, let's take out the time required for the things that I need to do. I'll start with absolute necessities. So, eight hours comes out for sleeping time (although I could sleep for probably ten hours if I had a day off). Now I have sixteen hours left. I have to take at least three of that for eating time, so now I have thirteen hours. I spend on average four hours daily doing some kind of school work, so we can subtract that from my time. That leaves me with nine hours. I easily spend two of that doing something with my dog--playing outside, giving her a bath, going for a car ride, whatever. (Once again, this is on average.) So I can take that out of my time, giving me seven hours. I can spend up to three of those hours on my computer doing something, unfortunately. Usually I am doing homework of some kind, but I like to play TERA and listen to music. I can eliminate three hours from my day, giving me four hours left. I am supposed to help my sister with her math, but lately I haven't made enough time for that. I can eliminate one hour for that chore, leaving me with three hours left in my day. Notice that I have yet to include any time for God? Unfortunately, by the time the rest of that is finished, I don't want to do anything but relax for those few hours. I end up talking to friends or doing extra-curricular activities. The One who deserves all of my attention has just been put to the bottom of my "to-do list."

The problem is, God shouldn't be included in a to-do list at all. We ought to focus our attention on Him because we want to, not because it is just another thing on our list.

I have an entry in my journal from about a month ago. It deals with this topic directly. In it, I made a list of what the world had to offer me. Well, what the world had to offer me when I didn't put God first. It goes as follows:

• I have lost my sense of self. 
• Depression. 
• Loss of desire for God. 
• Poor decision making. 
• Other such things. 

 I wrote this Bible verse along with it:

"But I myself said: I have labored in vain,
I have spent my strength for nothing and futility;
yet my vindication is with the Lord,
and my reward is with my God." (Isaiah 49:4 HCSB)

That last line there really hits home. "My reward is with my God." That reminds me that if I put Him first, then everything else will fall into place. Let me put it another way...

What matters more? God, or _______________?

 It doesn't matter what you fill the blank with, the answer is the same. "My Reward is with my God," and I trust him to take care of me. In all 24 hours of the day. But I need to prove that by putting Him first, and actually making time in my day to give to Him. He deserves all of my attention, not just what I have left to give. I have to remember that He gave me everything. So all of those things I spend my time with/on/doing are gifts from Him. I was reminded by that verse at that point in time to "stop putting the gift above the giver." 

Since then, I have been putting God first in my life. And, as expected, everything else is falling into place.

Reflections on Freedom

It's July 4th. This is the day that our nation celebrates it's freedom. This is the day we can say "Happy Birthday, America!" On this day in 1776, the Declaration of Independence was finalized and approved. Because of that, I would like to reflect on what "bought" us our freedoms.

America's desire for freedom was brought on by unfair treatment from the British Parliament.

"For more than a decade before the outbreak of the American Revolution in 1775, tensions had been building between colonists and the British authorities. Attempts by the British government to raise revenue by taxing the colonies (notably the Stamp Act of 1765, the Townshend Tariffs of 1767 and the Tea Act of 1773) met with heated protest among many colonists, who resented their lack of representation in Parliament and demanded the same rights as other British subjects. Colonial resistance led to violence in 1770, when British soldiers opened fire on a mob of colonists, killing five men in what was known as the Boston Massacre. After December 1773, when a band of Bostonians dressed as Mohawk Indians boarded British ships and dumped 342 chests of tea into Boston Harbor, an outraged Parliament passed a series of measures (known as the Intolerable, or Coercive Acts) designed to reassert imperial authority in Massachusetts." (History.com)

Basically, Great Britain was taxing the colonists unfairly and they demanded a change. When that argument escalated, it turned into a war. American's ought to know about the American revolution, so I will not restate much of what happened here. What I would like to point out is that our freedom was purchased through blood. Many people had to die for the idea of America before it even became a nation. Statistics say that there were 4,435 total American deaths during the Revolutionary War.

Another thing I want to briefly point out is that people are still dying for American freedoms. In 2010, a total of 1,485 military men and women were killed trying to protect your freedoms. In 2014, a total of 2,352 people were killed in the "Operation Enduring Freedom." In addition to that, 20,065 were injured. In 2014, a total of 4.412 military men and women involved with "Operation Iraqi Freedom" were killed. An additional 31,949 were injured. Each of these deaths and injuries were because these people wanted to defend you.

My point is that freedom is not "free," but we like to live like it is. I think that people choose not to think about the people who choose to die so that we can live. Thinking about that can have a somber affect on one's mood. Naturally, people don't like to be sad; therefore, they try to avoid things that make them sad. It's logical.

Alright, now because I'm me and I have the freedom to include my religious beliefs, there is one more thing I want to point out. My freedom to live and be happy came from the death of my Savior, Jesus Christ. My freedom to choose to follow Him, or to deny Him, came from His willingness to live the life of a poor man, and be murdered in the most humiliating way possible. He did that for me. He chose to so that I would recognize, if only on a small scale, how much He loves me. If you think about it, the punishment for sin is death. Jesus never sinned, and therefore He did not have to die. He died to give us the freedom of eternal life with Him. That is something that even my life will not pay for.

The cost of freedom is always blood. That is human logic. In order to maintain our freedoms, people have to die or be tortured. There is no other way to obtain it. History proves this to be true over and over again. So, when you watch fireworks on the 4th of July--Independence Day-- please remember to be thankful for those who laid down their lives to give you your freedom.

God Gave Me You.

I had an epiphany the other day. I was thinking about all of the people that are very dear to me and about how I describe them. I'll introduce them to others as "my" mom, "my" sister, "my" best friend, and so on. But then God reminded me ever so gently that these people do not "belong" to me. He has given them to me, or let me borrow them, while I am here. Let's take a little walk through scripture so I can show you how God reminded me of this.

Genesis chapter 2 is a good place to start. After God had created everything--the earth, the sea, the animals, and man-- God saw that Adam was lonely. Verse 18 is the first example of God giving a human a companion. "Then the Lord God said, 'It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper as his complement.'" (HCSB) God saw that Adam needed another human to be his "helper" and his "complement," so God let Adam have Eve.

Later, in chapter 22, God reminds Abraham that people are a precious gift. "'Take your son,' He said, 'your only son Isaac, whom you love, go to the land of Moriah, and offer him there as a burnt offering on one of the mountains I will tell you about.'" (Genesis 22:2 HCSB) This is quite the challenge! I don't honestly know how I would react initially if God told me to offer him my little sister, as she is the one that I hold dearest. I trust my God, but that would be a very hard command to obey. He is reminding Abraham that Isaac belongs to Him, but He has let Abraham borrow Isaac.

Moses' story shows many different examples of God's generosity.  The fact that God spared Moses' life, so he could fulfill God's promises to the Hebrews shows how God gives us people. Actually, one might even notice from this story how God gives us places as gifts. He gave the Hebrews their promised land, but perhaps He gives us a church or someplace to go home to. A comfort zone is a gift on many different levels.

The book of Ruth provides a powerful example of love, but it also shows how God blessed Ruth and Naomi with each other. Ruth 1:16-17 says "But Ruth replied: Do not persuade me to leave you, or go back and not follow you. For wherever you go, I will go, and wherever you live, I will live; your people will be my people, and your God will be my God. Where you die, I will die, and there I will be buried. May Yahweh punish me, and do so severely, if anything but death separates you and me." (HCSB) This woman followed God's commands, and God had commanded her to be with Naomi. God gave Ruth to Naomi, because He knew what would happen in her life that she would need a loyal companion.

The disciples had each other, but God brought them together. He gave them to one another so they wouldn't be lonely in the ungodly world. They served as "accountability buddies" as well. Basically, they were each blessed with people to keep them grounded in their faith, and to help them spread the gospel of Christ.

Paul was given a multitude of people to bless him in his walk with God. Silas, Barnabas, Timothy, even Stephen. He was never allowed to be lonely while ministering. God always blessed him with companions, but they were God's gift to give. Paul had no real control over what God chose to do with those people.

These were some things that crossed my mind when considering "my" family--my blessings from God. He gently reminded me that the people I hold dearest are given to me, because of how much He loves me. They are proof of His love for me. Now every time I think of them, I think of how grateful I am for a God that loves me enough to let me borrow some of His treasures.

The best way to describe to you "my" mom and "my" little sister is to say that they are my inspiration. They are pretty much the reason I get out of bed every morning. I can honestly say that if I didn't have either of them, I would not still be here. They save my life everyday in more ways than they even know. But God knows. He knows everything, so He knew that I needed them. He knew that they would be what brought me to Him. In fact, He knew that they would be what brought me to myself.

God let me borrow His Michelle and His Autumn, so that they could give me the best example of what His love looks like. I will be forever grateful that He allowed me to have them while I am here, and every time I think of them they will remind me Who's I am, and Who's they are. It takes a pretty generous God to give such precious gifts.

A Meaningful You

I wish when people said stuff, they meant it.

That statement is very plain to have so much meaning. Perhaps I should explain what I mean a little more thoroughly.

I don't exactly mean that people shouldn't lie. People lie all the time. Maybe not even on purpose, but it happens nonetheless. With specific regards to lying and my statement, I wish that people didn't tell hurtful lies. Things like "I love you," "I'll never give up on you," "You're worthless," etcetera. Those lies can drastically change lives. They either falsely build someone up, or tragically tear someone down. As far as the first two go, they aren't always lies. But if you don't really mean it, then you shouldn't ever say it. Actually, it is even possible to tell a hurtful truth nicely. My mother is incredibly gifted at that. Instead of saying something like "That dress makes you look like a beached whale." She will come up with something like "Try this! It is much more flattering." She is consistently proving to me that it is possible to say anything nicely.

Part of what I mean when I make this statement is what people do. Actions speak louder than words. For example, a father who tells his son not to drink alcohol, but is an alcoholic himself. No one respects a hypocrite, so why would anyone want to be one? Yet, there are far too many hypocrites in this world. People are consistently inconsistent with their actions. Multiple people in my life have said meaningful words and followed them with meaningless actions. I try never to follow their example. I try to never make promises I can't keep, and I encourage my readers to do the same.

I also mean that people should be the same in any and all circumstances. Personality shouldn't change when the group changes. One should always act the same. At work, at church, at home, at school. Everywhere people go, they should retain their perspective personality. If a person is not the same at school as they are at church, then they are "saying" something they don't mean. They are presenting a person at one or both of those places that doesn't exist. My advice? God created you for a purpose. If you change  who you are depending on your company, then you are not fulfilling His purpose for you. He only needs one of you, so that makes you pretty special. Troubles and all.

The norm these days is to be inconsistent. People almost demand that you change your ways to "fit in" with your crowd. Society has set the example of fluctuating personalities, depending on your circumstances or situation. Like puppets, people follow these rules and norms. In the end, they become a mixture of people that don't really exist. It must be hard to keep up with all of those people! My question for you is simple. Why would you want to be this way?  Why would you desire a life filled with things you don't mean and people that don't really exist? It will destroy you and God's purpose for your life.

If people would only say what they mean, both by words and by actions, this world would be much less confusing. I encourage all of you to be who you are, no matter who appreciates it. I want you all to stand for something so that you don't fall for everything. Don't let the world be the puppet-master of your life. Take what control you have, and be what you mean to be. Find you, and be you.

My Lesson for Today

^"13 As it is written in the law of Moses, all this evil is come upon us: yet made we not our prayer before the Lord our God, that we might turn from our iniquities, and understand thy truth.

¹⁴ Therefore hath the Lord watched upon the evil, and brought it upon us: for the Lord our God is righteous in all his works which he doeth: for we obeyed not his voice.

¹⁵ And now, O Lord our God, that hast brought thy people forth out of the land of Egypt with a mighty hand, and hast gotten thee renown, as at this day; we have sinned, we have done wickedly.

¹⁶ O Lord, according to all thy righteousness, I beseech thee, let thine anger and thy fury be turned away from thy city Jerusalem, thy holy mountain: because for our sins, and for the iniquities of our fathers, Jerusalem and thy people are become a reproach to all that are about us.

¹⁷ Now therefore, O our God, hear the prayer of thy servant, and his supplications, and cause thy face to shine upon thy sanctuary that is desolate, for the Lord's sake.

¹⁸ O my God, incline thine ear, and hear; open thine eyes, and behold our desolations, and the city which is called by thy name: for we do not present our supplications before thee for our righteousnesses, but for thy great mercies.

¹⁹ O Lord, hear; O Lord, forgive; O Lord, hearken and do; defer not, for thine own sake, O my God: for thy city and thy people are called by thy name." (Daniel 9:13-19)

These are the verses I have spent the last few days trying to memorize. (Yes, I have successfully done so!) It's long, I know, and I commend you for reading it all! It is beautiful and it teaches a tragic lesson of love and mourning. Let's take a look at it, verse by verse.

Daniel starts off by saying that his people knew what would happen because they were warned. They just didn't want to believe that their God would punish them for their sins, so they didn't ask for help. This is classic of children. Actually, it is classic of people in general. We always think that we're right and no one is going to correct us, so we don't ask for help or guidance. This can lead to big trouble! It definitely led to trouble for the Israelites.

The next thing that Daniel notes is that God does punish His people. Anyone who has read the Bible knows that a good parent will chastise his children. However, Daniel also notes that God punishes His people lovingly. It is important to recognize the last part of that verse, because everything God does is righteous. What child willingly acknowledges that his parents were right in punishing him? Daniel makes sure to point that out for us. He recognizes that his people have disobeyed God, and that they deserve what is coming to them.

In verse 15 Daniel reveals what God has done for His people ("that hast brought thy people forth out of the land of Egypt with a mighty hand..."). He tells us again how good God is, and then points out how wicked people are. This shows that people fall into temptation easier than they may like to admit. Even God's chosen people, who saw Him work in ways we can't even imagine, fell into one of Satan's traps.

Verse 16 turns the tables a little bit. Daniel decides here that he is going to challenge God (to some extent). He asks God to "turn thine anger and thy fury away from thy city Jerusalem."  He is mourning for his nation. First, he tells God that he knows there is evil. Then, he says that they deserve the evil, because everything God does is right and good. After that he praises God's goodness and tells Him that he knows the people have sinned and done wickedly. So why does he ask God not to be angry? Why does he try to explain that the nation is already going through trouble? Keep reading.

Daniel continues to ask God not to be angry. Now he asks God to look upon His "sanctuary that is desolate." He knows that the only way that his people can come out of their turmoil is if they have God's help. And so he proceeds to beg God to save Israel. Again.

The last two verses are actually my favorite part. Daniel is still mourning for his country. But now, he's revealing his heart to God while he mourns. He tells God why Israel needs Him. He doesn't pour his heart out to God for his righteousness, but for God's great mercy. He knows that he is just a sinner, and that he isn't good enough for God. But he also recognizes God's great mercy and compassion. He knows that God loves His people, so he begs Him to show that great mercy once again.

Okay, now that we can see all of that clearly, let's compare it to our present-world state. Isn't America undergoing some evil? Europe?  Asia? You name it? Isn't our world enduring some evil? More importantly, we were warned, weren't we? Just like Israel. And, just like Israel, God is angry. The difference is that there aren't very many Daniel's out there nowadays that are truly mourning for their country. Not many people are begging God to open His eyes and see our desolation. Very few people are asking God for guidance, help and forgiveness.

Our world needs more Daniels. People need to mourn for their country the way he did. Christians need to stand up and be heard. We need to take a look at our surroundings and fight for what we know is right. We need to call upon our omniscient, omnipotent God for guidance, help and forgiveness. We need to pray Daniel's prayer and mean it the way that he did.

This enlightenment has helped me "find me" in a way. It has helped me learn to mourn for the lost, for the world, for my nation. It has helped me learn to pray by revealing my heart to God. He knows it anyway, but He likes it when I'm willing to share with Him. This lesson has helped me get a little closer to God, because it came directly from Him.

I Know Who You Are

Most of the time when I read my Bible I just open it and begin at the top of the page. God always opens it to the perfect section for whatever I am going through. This habit is usually very eye-opening for me.

Here lately I've been in Psalms and Proverbs, flip-flopping back and forth a little. Mostly what I've been reading has to do with how the world has "made void" God's word, but we as Christians are supposed to trust and obey it. This is something I have been struggling with, as I have been taking a philosophy course in college. The world is doing a very good job in convincing people that God is dead and that bothers me to no end!

Last night I opened my Bible to Matthew. I began reading where Jesus is asking the disciples who and what the people think He is. This made me consider who and what the people now think He is. I would say that the education system (and other systems, of course) is doing an excellent job in making people believe that He is dead. That would make Him nothing more than a good man. Christians know that Jesus didn't stay dead, but rather He was resurrected. That makes Him much more than a man. I continued reading to where Jesus asks them "but who do you say that I am." This made me realize something.

It doesn't matter what the world says that Jesus is. I know better. I know that He is the son of the Living God, and that He is always present in my life. If the people of the world do not see that in me and you, they will not see it at all. Jesus told me to ignore how the world was making Him and His words void and trust in Him. That is something I needed to hear, and I will keep that in mind as I go through this life. We need to show the world who we know Jesus is.